Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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