If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize