i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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