Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize