so that wasnt chicken after all
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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