I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize