Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize