Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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