Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
You were trust falling into bushes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize