It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize