Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
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