yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize