So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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