something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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