We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize