I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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