im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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