just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize