shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
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I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
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Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
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