do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
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And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
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She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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