u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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