I got chris browned last night
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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