Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...

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(734): Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception... http://tfl.nu/2wqa

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

New invention idea: vibrating tampons

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(832): New invention idea: vibrating tampons http://tfl.nu/xv0s

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(563): View more from Iowa

I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"

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(563): I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical" http://tfl.nu/2xah

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(407): View more from Florida

at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions

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(407): at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions http://tfl.nu/ea5m

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(816): View more from Missouri

dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...

(1-816): View more from Missouri

Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.

(816): View more from Missouri

that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.

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(816): dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock... (1-816): Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings. (816): that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it. http://tfl.nu/66g0

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(513): View more from Ohio

I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.

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(513): I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again. http://tfl.nu/s5qg

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(443): View more from Maryland

Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.

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(443): Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar. http://tfl.nu/j1fg

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(719): View more from Colorado

Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.

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(719): Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon. http://tfl.nu/ncwf

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.

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(610): Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions. http://tfl.nu/3hq7

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(740): View more from Ohio

Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.

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(740): Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever. http://tfl.nu/lye3

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(304): View more from West Virginia

she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference

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(304): she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference http://tfl.nu/95t7

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.

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(+44): next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius. http://tfl.nu/19nm

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(307): View more from Wyoming

Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.

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(307): Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness. http://tfl.nu/pn5t

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(847): View more from Illinois

sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.

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(847): sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys. http://tfl.nu/l0ff

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(516): View more from New York

My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?

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(516): My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently? http://tfl.nu/xsqm

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