their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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