Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
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