a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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