Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They took my balls.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
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