if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
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