I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize