The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
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