Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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