I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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