my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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