I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize