Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
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