So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
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St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
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Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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