well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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