sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
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I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
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I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
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