apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
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