The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
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Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
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Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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