Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
dude. I can hear the air.
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