This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
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