Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
it glows. i had to have it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize