I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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