don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
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