Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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