Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
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I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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