If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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