my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize