We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
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i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
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Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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